Hande Özkan Zollo - K. Sivaramakrishnan Reflection

Hande Özkan Zollo
Transylvania University

In 2003 I was a graduate student in Turkey. I had finished my MA in modern Turkish history at Boğaziçi University and was in the second year of my PhD in the same program. As my interest in cultural and social history blended with a curiosity about forests and forestry, my dissertation topic gradually emerged. However, the more cultural history I read, the more curious I was about an academic discipline which had not even crossed my mind before: anthropology. At the time, anthropology was not a very popular academic discipline in Turkey. Given anthropology’s colonial origins, it never became a major focus of academic interest in Turkey except for in the early years of the Republic when physical anthropology was essential to the nationalist project. Until I got exposed to cultural history and the heavy dose of anthropological influence in many cultural historians’ scholarship, anthropology simply did not exist for me. As I read the works of scholars like Robert Darnton, Roger Chartier and Lynn Hunt, I got more and more interested in anthropology, which led me to make a life-changing decision. I decided that I needed to become an anthropologist to explore the cultural and social underpinnings of Turkish forestry. It is in this context that I came across Shivi’s work, and it did not take long for me to realize that University of Washington was going to be one of my top 
choices as I applied to anthropology programs in this country. 

Once I started receiving responses from schools, a hard decision had to be made. Where to go? Shivi’s forthcoming, supportive communication via email sealed the deal. I had no idea who I would work with at another school. Even though my two years in Seattle were challenging from a personal, cultural and financial perspective, I have not once regretted the decision I made. Meeting Shivi changed my life. My two years in Seattle were followed by my transfer to Yale University when 
Shivi moved to his new position. It was not an easy decision to make, but Shivi’s support in that process was tremendous and that support continued to be unwavering until I finished my doctoral work. When I got offered a job at Transylvania University -which is where I continue to teach and was promoted to full professor a few months ago- I was terrified. It was thanks to Shivi’s encouragement and recommendations that I was able to finish my dissertation and complete my PhD. 
My academic career is different from many of Shivi’s students. I work at a teachingfocused liberal arts college where there are also a lot of service work expectations. Regardless, in my teaching, scholarship, and service I have continued to be inspired by Shivi.

But Shivi’s impact on my life has not only been at an academic level. Had I not moved to New Haven to follow him, I would not have met my husband Chris who works here at the Medical Historical Library. This was not an easy move for me. I was already 30 years old when I moved from Turkey to the United States. Just as I was getting adjusted to living in a different country, relocating to a new city shattered my already fragile status quo. My first year in New Haven was not easy and Shivi might remember the depressive episode I went through. I still remember the guilt I felt when I disclosed my struggle to him, but more importantly the sincere personal details that were part of his response during our conversations. That year passed and in the midst of it, I met my husband, and Connecticut, which is where I still live, became my home. 

I often wonder what my life would have been like if I had not sent Shivi an email after reading his work, if I had decided to accept another university’s oƯer before I left Turkey or if I had decided to stay in Seattle when Shivi moved here. When such questions come to my mind, they do not stay long because I realize that all that happened was meant to happen. There were many choices that could have been made, but what is fascinating is that these were not only choices that I had to make; Shivi’s choices were also part of this puzzle of life. That is why when I ponder about my life and my choices, Shivi is always there. 

Thank you, Shivi, for agreeing to work with me all those years ago, thank you for helping me to move to New Haven and thank you for changing my life. I would not dream of doing it any other way. 
 

Hande Özkan Zollo